Cooking's frickin' awesome, yo.
I've always enjoyed cooking and it makes me so unhappy when I hear that people don't do it, or think it's a chore.
Part of that is that most recipes aren't actually designed to be made. They're designed to look cool on the front of your cookbook, or to justify your own intelligence, or to draw people onto some overengineered website with like five pop-ups asking for permission to sell their data to a marketing firm.
And frankly, fuck that. You don't need a kitchen full of exotic ingredients or a refined and delicate sense of taste to turn ingredients into something delicious -- all you need is two pots and love.
The spirit of Neocities is all about making things that have substance and utility, so I'm using it to archive my favourite recipes. Here's what you can expect from the things here:
- no bullshit anecdotes. I get straight to the list of ingredients and the recipe.
- no fancy-ass ingredients. I don't have a buttload of cash to blow on unique ingredients that only exist to make me feel like a big fancy chef. Just buy the cheapest crap you can from whatever supermarket you like. What matters is it's made with love.
- instructions that are actually useful. Screw setting a timer for ten minutes -- how long to cook something depends on your oven and your kitchen and the mix of ingredients you made. I'll tell you how you can tell when it's done.
- alterations for veggie cooking. I learned how to cook as a meat-eater and a lot of the stuff I like to make the most is still meaty, but a lot of the people I love to cook for most are veggie and vegan so I'm using V and Vg to show that you can do this without meat, or without animal products. It's still really easy to make tasty-ass food that's entirely veggie and even if you aren't one yourself I'd definitely encourage you to try it, cause not having to do like five separate dishes will make cooking for all your cool vegetarian friends way easier. It's also cheap as fuck and probably healthy for you or something i don't know
- i'm not gonna piss my britches over authenticity. I'm english, we basically toured the world and stole everyone's culture and then turned it into a fucked up version of itself that isn't quite as good, and i've kinda made my peace with that and i'm not gonna fight it. So sorry folks, but my chilli con carne is gonna have kidney beans in it.
- i'm gonna talk about other ways you can do the receipe but not 'till after I've told you the damn recipe, 'cause I'm pretty sure when you just wanna know whether it wants three eggs or two you're not in the mood for a dissertation about the cultural impact of 9/11 on my chocolate chip cookie recipe.
Oh yeah, watch out, cause If you know how to cook already you're gonna feel really fukken patronised by these recipes. I'm gonna explain every step like you're a complete dumbass who doesn't know the first thing about cooking, 'cause better to do that than make it inaccessible.
I'm gonna be fleshing out these as and when I write 'em, and then add pictures when I find the time to cook them.
Vaguely Mexican I guess probably
- Chilli con carne
- Refried beans (V, Vg)
- Salsa (V, Vg)
- Guacamole (V, Vg)
- Sriacha (V, Vg)
Other crap that doesn't fit anywhere else
- Piri Piri sauce (V, Vg)
- Coq au vin
- Devilled Kidneys
- Braised Heart
- Spanish Omelette (V, Vg)
- Potato Pancakes (V, Vg)
- Cookies (V)
- Fruit Cake (V)
- Chocolate Orange Cake (V)